The word "boudoir" has been twisted and reshaped by the modern photography genre. Now, when most people think of boudoir photography they think of hyper-sexualized images of women with highly glamourized hair and makeup that are photoshopped to perfection. Those kinds of photos never really appealed to me. In my experience as an, ahem, older woman, I've come to know that I feel sexiest when I feel good about myself as-is. I also know that when I feel confident is also when I am the most attractive to others. When I'm cool with myself as-is, people are drawn to me. I'm proud of my imperfections, my sagging breasts, my wrinkly skin, because they are a huge part of what makes me me. I don't need or want to hide them. And to be honest, just mentioning those flaws to friends comes with shocked rebuttals, proving that we are are own worst critics. Also, I know that tomorrow my body will change and be even more saggy and wrinkly. There is no use in not embracing every iteration of my ever changing body, changing the paradigm and seeing all versions of myself as beautiful. To do anything else would rob me of joy.
"I'm proud of the imperfections because they are a huge part of what makes me me."
A "boudoir" is technically a woman's private dressing or sitting room. It's where she has control and privacy. She can laugh, scream, cry, dance, dress up, dress down, take off her makeup, put on her makeup, whatever the hell she wants. It's not a place to woo a lover, but she can if she wants. A boudoir is a sacred space for her. It's a place for her to be her most authentic self. That is the inspiration behind the messy wild type of "boudoir photography" I love. I'm a little messy and wild inside. If I show that side of me to someone it means I trust them to love me because of it, not in spite of it. That's real love. And I feel it for myself, too. I love my wild mind that takes me all over the emotional board, that moves me to dance like there's a fire inside me or sing at the top of my lungs when a song really lights me up. I'd be sad if it was too quiet in my head and I never felt overcome with passion. I like myself and I love seeing photos of my younger self that show that real emotion. I would have loved a shoot like this when I was in my 20's and 30's, to embrace how I've changed and grown over the years. It's my dream for all women to get to this place in their minds well before I did in my 40's, so they're not regretful of not embracing themselves and having a shoot like this every decade! But, at least it's never too late to start!
"I would have loved a shoot like this when I was in my 20's and 30's, to embrace how I've changed."
A lover will see intimate, vulnerable, authentic photos of you as a huge gift. That you are so connected with each other that you would share yourself with them this way. It is the ultimate gift to a partner and yourself.
Here is a gallery of images of a beautiful soul who agreed to let me share her private messy, wild self. She is in her late forties and, like me, wishes she'd done a shoot like this in every phase of her life. She loves her stretch marks, her dimpled skin, and her tummy scars, and so I loved photographing them!
I'm located just northwest of Los Angeles in the Conejo Valley, California, serving Calabasas, Agoura Hills, Westlake Village, Thousand Oaks, Oak Park, Malibu, Moorpark, Newbury Park, West Hills, Woodland Hills, Ventura County and Los Angeles.